26 January 2012

Thank You Note

Thank you for responding with lots of interesting comments on my birth post. It appears that almost no one has a smooth ride. And that's ok, right? Just means the way we talk about birth needs to change and we need to acknowledge that it's a complex, often difficult process, involving all sorts of emotions from fear to elation. As far as I'm concerned, if I am ever doing it again, I will not pressure myself at all and just be honest about it if newly pregnant friends ask my opinion. And not everyone needs to have bad experience. I think mine would have been much better if I hadn't approached it as if I was preparing for a yoga retreat. Seriously.
For the moment I'm concentrating on the here and now.
Next time, I'll tell you all about my postnatal depression and how I spent 4 weeks in the psych mother baby unit. I am just bags of fun and joy, let me throw it around like confetti!
But look how far we've come!


Sally said...

Sounds like it has been a real ride for you. I had ante-natal (and then post natal) depression with my second child. Geez ... being a mother - it's a barrel of laughs hey?
Good that you were able to go to the psych unit.
... and yes... look how far you've come. The only was is up?

Kathryn said...

Oh Tina. Been there, done that, bought the t-shirt, sent the postcards. If you ever want to talk to someone who had an horrific first birth and then a baby that screamed, never slept and generally sent me crazy fucking loco, lemme know, ok? You can find me at my blog or twitter (cloudlovebaby).

I had my second baby last May and it WAS the earth shattering, amazing, incredible, empowering birth that they all rabbit on about. And yeah, it totally rocked my world, in really great ways, but it made me even more angry that no one understood my first experience. It's really fucking easy to talk good stuff when you haven't lived the hell it can be.


Point is, good on you for sharing. GOOD ON YOU. Too much is not spoken about for fear of being seen as weak or LESS.


If you feel like it, I just wrote this last week http://cloudlovebaby.blogspot.com/2012/01/remember.html about *my* shit house arrival to motherhood.

(Really, I'm going now, honest!)

Gina said...

Gorgeous lady, I'm not on blogs much these days but it is great to see you and your lovely one. Glad you've found your feet a bit... glad to hear you went to an MBU, not a nice place to end up but for me it was a lifesaver. I hope you found it helpful. xxx

NessaKnits said...

The more women talk about the reality of the awful experiences we have, the less likely new mums are going to fall into the thought pattern that "I am the worst mother ever, and I just can't do this ...". The smile on your face in that photo tells me things have improved greatly. Good job. Life is a rollercoaster ... you just have to ride it ... remember that!

NessaKnits said...

Here is another comment to think about. Don't be surprised if your craft mojo is sometime returning. You have other things to think about and do now you have a baby ... I have boxes of DMC threads I was going to use one day when I had all that time after I had a baby and guess how many have been used ... oh well ... the day will come!

Squiggly Rainbow said...

am excited to read that post - if only I knew and realised and someone else realised what a PN mess I was - maybe I would be better now! Ha!